I'm in such a weird state of existence right now.

I have spent so long working to be better at art better at that side of my life.
the social side has taken a massive dive, 
I now feel scared to talk to people I have known for years, 
I worry about asking people to hang out,
going for a drink or food or a movie to do something stupid 
all the things I used to love doing but now I am on a pause 
because just the fear of rejection is repeated over and over.

I used to embrace the unknown now I cower from it wishing to have it again.... but again its Friday night 
I'm not talking to anyone.......
and I don't know how to fix this

witch, when I look at it, is weird because in my self in the best version of me that ever has been ..... so I'm stumped on what to do now. what steps to take forward.